Changed for Good

As many of you know, a few months ago our family adopted a young MoHo--more or less. He didn't really live here, but he came over at least 2 or 3 times a week--sometimes more. Scott reached out to him when he was in the depths of despair, and then as he allowed our family to become his family, we were able to share a lot of good and bad times with him.

We were together for birthdays, for holidays, for the excitement and every detail of his first boyfriend, a double-date to see "Were the World Mine" for Valentines, for the sadness and heartbreak of his first breakup, for the anxiety and liberation of his coming out to all of his family and friends. He shared every detail of his life with Scott every day, joined us for family prayer too many times to count, texted me every time a certain song came on the radio, and insisted that I join in his karaoke fun by singing his blog-title song with him at almost every party the last few months. I was finally starting to get the hang of it.

His life continued to improve and exciting changes meant he had less time to spend with us, and we missed him but we understood. But then came more good changes, the main one being to find what he believes to be the love of his life. We were excited for him! We wanted to hear the details again, meet him, double date, like we did with the last bf. But the details never came, and the visits never came, and then finally he came when we begged him to, but the closeness was gone, the karaoke and the good times gone forever.

As I have spent some time mourning the loss of this member of our family, and have watched my children miss and long for him as well, something occurred to me yesterday...

How often do some of us turn to God when we need him, pleading for his spirit and companionship and comfort? But then, when life is good and busy, how many of us have excuses why we don't have time to pray anymore, why we don't need to pray any more? Do you think that God might go through withdrawals from the details of our lives, that He stands by watching us, happy that we are happy, but sad that we no longer share the details and the love and gratitude with Him?

I'm pretty sure I do that very thing quite often because life is so busy. I forget when things are good not only how much I need Him in my life, but also, that He possibly might need me in His life. He has so many children, does it even matter when when one of us does not share the happiness of our lives with Him? I think it does.

I am grateful to learn good lessons from sad times in my life. We may not ever get back the closeness of the friend we had, but we can realize through the experience, he and us both have been changed for good, and I have been privileged to learn about the true nature of my Father in Heaven, and His love for me. Hopefully I can do better at letting Him be a part of my life.

For Good, from Wicked

I've heard it said
That people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led
To those who help us most to grow
If we let them
And we help them in return
Well, I don't know if I believe that's true
But I know I'm who I am today
Because I knew you...

Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
But because I knew you
I have been changed for good

It well may be
That we will never meet again
In this lifetime
So let me say before we part
So much of me
Is made of what I learned from you
You'll be with me
Like a handprint on my heart
And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have re-written mine
By being my friend...

Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a skybird
In a distant wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
But because I knew you

Because I knew you

I have been changed for good

And just to clear the air
I ask forgiveness
For the things I've done you blame me for

But then, I guess we know
There's blame to share

And none of it seems to matter anymore

Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood

Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a bird in the wood

Who can say if I've been
Changed for the better?
I do believe I have been
Changed for the better

And because I knew you...

Because I knew you...

Because I knew you...
I have been changed for good...