tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6972661907029038524.post2556034002474482598..comments2023-10-19T05:34:26.911-06:00Comments on Serendipity: ConfusionSarahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08765524620705643823noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6972661907029038524.post-56317411918282716492008-10-24T16:18:00.000-06:002008-10-24T16:18:00.000-06:00Yes, Scott reminds me all the time of my overdevel...Yes, Scott reminds me all the time of my overdeveloped sense of responsibility. I can't even skip out on ward choir practice without feeling guilty!<BR/><BR/>:)Sarahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08765524620705643823noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6972661907029038524.post-27857036199502300112008-10-24T06:51:00.000-06:002008-10-24T06:51:00.000-06:00It seems like you're taking on too much ownership ...<I>It seems like you're taking on too much ownership and responsibility about things.</I><BR/><BR/>You know in <I>The Princess Bride</I>, when Íñigo Montoya is chasing Count Rugen through the castle and the Count tells Íñigo "You have an overdeveloped sense of vengeance. It's going to get you in trouble one of these days."?<BR/><BR/>Replace "vengeance" with "responsibility" and that's Serendipity. :)Scotthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15332275934258698026noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6972661907029038524.post-4452953496146720792008-10-23T23:32:00.000-06:002008-10-23T23:32:00.000-06:00Hi Serendipity-I'm sorry to know you're struggling...Hi Serendipity-<BR/><BR/>I'm sorry to know you're struggling. It's coincidental...before I read your post I was writing a post that I haven't published yet about happiness...you'll see it in a couple of days maybe.<BR/><BR/>As I was preparing to come out to my family I decided to start seeing a therapist. Mostly I needed someone for support and an objective person I could bounce ideas and thoughts off of. <BR/><BR/>That was two years ago and I am still seeing her. It's only once a month, but I find myself energized and excited about my life and goals in my life when I leave her office. <BR/><BR/>Everyone is different and we all struggle with our own crosses. <BR/><BR/>It seems like you're taking on too much ownership and responsibility about things. <BR/><BR/>And you know sometimes we all need to get away from the drudgery of every day. Perhaps you need a weekend to escape reality...to just relax and refill your reserves.<BR/><BR/>I don't have any answers, Serendipity! I wish I did. But I want you to know I will pray for you and you will be in my thoughts.<BR/><BR/>We all struggle and have low points. It's a natural part of life. There must be opposition in all things or we can never appreciate the good times. <BR/><BR/>I sound like a lump of cliches! I am sorry. I wish I had something better to tell you. I just want you to know that you have a friend in your corner...and I'm standing right there by Scott, too! <BR/><BR/>Hang in there it will get better! <BR/><BR/>Love ya!<BR/><BR/>DamonAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6972661907029038524.post-79277647801069025102008-10-23T20:48:00.000-06:002008-10-23T20:48:00.000-06:00I feel so much for you... I hate the idea that my ...I feel so much for you... I hate the idea that my orientation affects our marriage so much. I long for Claire's happiness each day of my life, and it pains me to think that I (or really the dynamics of our situation) causes that deep hurt. <BR/><BR/>You both are very much in the thick of things. Claire would have died if I suggested we start blogging about our lives within a couple of months of me coming out to her. We are two years since that revelation, and we are still not comfortable revealing our identities.<BR/><BR/>Like you, we have been very concerned about happiness and authenticity. I have found a couple of resources that I have really enjoyed and brought a great deal of perspective. This first is "The Happiness Hypotheses" by Jonathan Haidt - It is absolutely fantastic and helping understand the mechanisms behind our pursuit of happiness and that we are generally looking for it in all the wrong places. This, above all other books, has convinced me that what I have is true happiness and joy. I could go looking elsewhere, but I would probably never find what I have - especially if that was the reason that I went looking.<BR/><BR/>The second resource is called "The How of Happiness" by Sonja Lyubomirsky. Haidt's book lays the foundation for me, but Lyubomirsky's book charts out practical suggestions for finding happiness.<BR/><BR/>Claire suggests "Simple Abundance" by Sarah Ban Breathnach - it is a daily devotional for women.<BR/><BR/>I feel for you. I am so sorry that you have to be going through what you are.Carter Nivenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15681607260265331979noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6972661907029038524.post-70245475230825630722008-10-23T20:32:00.000-06:002008-10-23T20:32:00.000-06:00What's the emoticon for someone who's trying not t...What's the emoticon for someone who's trying not to cry because their heart is aching so much?<BR/><BR/>If I thought it would make things better I'd yell "April fools!" and go back in my closet and never again mention the g-word.<BR/><BR/>All I can say is that we'll get through this together, like we've gotten through every other struggle and difficulty, because we love each other and are here for each other.<BR/><BR/>(For the record, I enjoy our time in the mornings while I'm packing your lunch and I don't mind making your smoothies. I can't say I <I>enjoy</I> planning dinner, but I usually don't really mind it all that much. And I feel bad that the cat is sick and I know that nobody else can handle him well enough to get his pills in him, so I'll accept that job, too (even though I'm really not a cat person... or a pet person at all, really).<BR/><BR/>I've told you all of this before, but maybe putting it in writing will make it more real?<BR/><BR/>I love you! And I'm going to stop blogging now so I can hold you for a while.Scotthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15332275934258698026noreply@blogger.com